How to survive a big move as an Empath, a Single Parent, and with 5 pets! Yes you can!
Updated: Nov 15, 2017
After living for 24 years in Asia I have just completed what I hope is the last move I will ever make across continents, at least for a long time!
Having lived in the U.K., Brunei, Hong Kong and Malaysia, and 22 moves within those countries (4 internationally), the last move to Spain has really tested me the most. I should quantify that by adding that there were a few key elements that complicated the proceedings, namely being a single parent, exporting 5 senior animals out of a country that is not the kindest to animals, monsoon season, and navigating 3 foreign countries simultaneously and remotely.
It sounds like a lot doesn't it, and it is, but the one aspect that adds more complexity is that I am also an Empath, and a high functioning one. Believe me it has its place in my world of intuitive coaching, and it's a wonderful gift, but when you have to move as I just did, it would be more useful to have a coat of armour. In my world, anything is possible and everything is achievable, so to fail or falter is not an option, not because I can't fail - I do regularly - but because if I fell apart, there would be no-one else to look after my child and pets.
I am 3 weeks in, and still standing, and whilst it isn't easy, I am living proof that what may seem impossible or insurmountable, is actually achievable. And you CAN do it if you're an highly intuitive Empath and a single parent.
I wrote these tips below on my 5th day in the country. They are written with an Empath in mind, as despite what you may think, being an Empath is real, and it is something that needs to be listened to and understood.
There are many articles out there explaining what an Empath is, so I won't go into it here in detail apart from to leave you with this visual. Being an Empath can often feel like you've just fallen into a tank full of toxins and poisons with a dozen man-eating sharks hovering above you while you have no obvious way to get out. The toxins symbolise the internal poisoning that negative energy can have on an Empath, and the sharks swim at a distance hovering to jump in for the kill if you put a foot wrong - people do that also, and they judge constantly. It's a visual that will surprise you if you have little or no awareness about yourself or the world, but for a great many, they will know what this visual means.
Empaths learn to shield their environment very well, and I have learned very effectively how to shield the unsavoury characters that drop into my life from time to time, but when you are stressed, or for instance go through a big move, get divorced, deal with a death etc., then that is a tough time for Empaths and the shielding process has to first get them through a healing before being able to shield out the nasty stuff. It's a big topic, and I will write more, but wanted to firstly share these tips that I wrote shortly after arriving in our new home.
Tips to integrate smoothly into a completely new environment:
1. Don't panic. It's all new and embrace the "newness" and how brave you actually are for making the move in the first place. 2. Don't try to do everything at once. Prioritise. For me I wanted to be able to drive (no easy feat for me and I chose to have hypnotherapy before I left to remove the major blocks associated with driving on the other side of the road and car), to find the supermarket, and find school. Mission accomplished. The rest will follow. 3. Take care of the humans and animals in your care first - the other "stuff" can wait. 4. Find a friend or two who can be your support. It's mind boggling how tough it is to be surrounded by a different language and driving on the other side of the road and the car....for empaths, this is all panic - inducing stuff. So ask for help when you need it. 5. Just "breathe" when it gets tough. 6. Find positives associated with your new place. For me it's the cooler weather for my doggies who are very happy (the cats are not I might add!) and the amazing fresh fruits and veggies that actually taste of what they should taste. Every day I find something positive about living in Spain. The first night we arrived utterly exhausted and hardly able to walk but I went to sleep with the windows open and lovely fresh air blowing through the bedroom - I haven't had that for 24 years. It made all the difference and I woke up in less pain and happy lungs! 7. The world is a small place. And now we live in another dot in the world. Our friends that matter will always be close, regardless of where we live and we hold them dear in our hearts. Yes we miss them but both Keira and I feel richer and more complete for having known them in our lives. And in return we can teach what we learn about Spain and Europe. 8. We only have one life. Be brave enough to take a leap of faith. Yes it is scary but you will always find angels along the way to help you, which is what happened to me. When I get to the end of my life, I want to be able to say "at least I was brave enough to try". 9. Everything is just an illusion. Destiny has its ups and downs but just be kind and help those who need it. The Universe will not steer you wrong. 10. Take a leap of faith - you may just get everything you ever wanted in life. But if you don't try, you won't know.